My idea of a vacation is to see everything worth seeing in a 50 mile radius of where I touch down. If there is a battlefield, a winery, a museum, an amusement park, or something completely weird and random like a park composed entirely of 18 foot tall busts of American Presidents (get your mind out of the gutter), I’m there and then some. So much so that when I get back from vacation, I’m usually more tired than when I left.
Not that I’m knocking it– it’s a system that works well for me. But this particular family trip to Sanibel Island was different. Maybe it was the smothering heat and choking humidity that Florida can still serve up in September, or maybe it was my growing list of “Things Gone Wrong in 2013”, but I decided a vacation of doing absolutely nothing was just the ticket.
By nothing, I don’t mean that I wasn’t up at the crack of dawn every day taking long walks on the beach, because I was. Or that I didn’t haul my camera bag absolutely everywhere with me– 2,000 pictures and counting, lucky you. But instead of driving to the Everglades, sailing to Key West, or touring the Ford/Edison winter estates in Fort Myers (does “winter estate” sound pretentious to anyone else, or is that just my upbringing?) I stayed on Sanibel Island and fell into a routine; one that I already miss, and that will be the tiny smoldering ember warming my heart during the coldest, bleakest, crappiest, why-oh-why-do-I-live-here, month in Pennsylvania, otherwise known as February.
So here’s a run down of a perfect, do-nothing day, on Sanibel Island.
Get up early and pick up some Tribbles, I mean, shells.
Sanibel Island is uniquely positioned in the Gulf of Mexico and is known for it’s multitude and variety of seashells that wash up on the beach. You think you know, but you don’t. Day one, you’re blown away and spend the day hunched over, filling nylon bags with shells, shells, and more shells. By day two, you have a kink in your neck from shambling about the beach like a zombie looking down for the perfect shells and the spoiled air of a 13 year old girl receiving wide-leg jeans for Christmas when they asked for bootcut. Agh! This Banded Tulip shell has a chip out of the bottom– it’s like, God hates me!
Bike Ride to Breakfast
Trust me, all of the major roads are lined with bike paths which gives you an opportunity to slow down and see the island up close and also makes you feel entitled to eat whatever you want for breakfast and if that includes a 16oz Mimosa, then cheers!
Lay About the Beach in a Listless Manner and Read Nonsense.
This is actually harder than it seems because of the aforementioned smothering heat, the yet to be mentioned sand fleas that bothered no one but me, and the Gulf of Mexico looking all innocent and enticing with it’s next-to-nothing waves and extended sand bars. Sharks, sting-rays, and jelly-fish be damned! I am jumping in that ocean!
Watch a thunderstorm roll in.
This is Florida after all, and what is a day in Florida without a thunderstorm or a sudden of deluge of rain to throw a hiccup in your plans? We had the last laugh though; as it turns out, rain doesn’t really interfere with floating in a hot tub while drinking a Margarita. Did I say cheers already? Oh, what the hell– Cheers!
Enjoy a fresh seafood dinner and take in the show.
My personal favorite. The only thing I love more than seafood, is seafood with a view of the beach. Our first night on Sanibel, my family proposed the idea of dining at an Italian restaurant while on the island. I’m sorry, but if I wanted meatballs, I would go to my grandmother’s; furthermore, I did not fly to Florida to eat Manicotti. Swordfish, crab cakes, BBQ shrimp, and fried scallops on the other hand... And what is the perfect desert other than a beautiful sunset served at your feet with a cold beer in hand?
So over all, not a bad day, am I right? Repeat for five consecutive days and you will start to feel like a human being who doesn’t need a smart phone other than to send “Na-nana-naa-nah!” pictures to all of your relatives and friends back home. Now as for next year.... I don’t know, “Winter Estate” and “Airboat Tour” is starting to grow on me.
